patriarchy in the bedroom?
bethechange
There was an era when men were the masters of not only the house but also the bedroom. Unfortunately, many couples still have not moved forward and are made to believe that this still holds true.
In so many households still, there is so much patriarchy in the bedroom too. Many of us have grown up hearing these whispers from the society
• The sole purpose of a woman after marriage was to satisfy her husband. If she did not do it, then she must be a “bad girl”.
• The first move should be from the man else. He might not like it.
• She should do it the way he likes it.
• She should gift her “virginity” to him.
• She shouldn’t say no when he wants it; else, she paves the way for him to go elsewhere for it.
• She has never been told, well better to put it he was never told that satisfaction in the bedroom should be mutual.
• She should be the one to adjust. If he ever strayed, then she is to be blamed; she did not satisfy him.
• Whenever he wants it, she has to do it.
• She should always be available, whether it was mental exhaustion with the kids or physical exhaustion with chores.
We cannot stop society’s whispers of patriarchy, but we can choose to shut our ears and our daughter’s and our son’s ears from it.
Let’s teach our kids about equality in a marriage/ relationship. Let our daughters get the confidence to feel like equal partners to their husbands, which in the past and still for some even now looks like a distant dream.
Before all this, look into your bedroom; you don’t need to fake it anymore; you can tell him that satisfaction should be mutual, and you can say “no” when you don’t want to do it. If we don’t do it today, maybe we will never give our daughter the confidence to say “no” tomorrow.