Pregnancy could be the most exciting thing as well as the most stressful one to experience. There will be a drastic change happening inside while the baby is growing in the womb. During labor a mother-to-be would be surrounded by strangers that makes her panic more. Throughout her pregnancy and labor she needs a supportive partner. Being a supportive partner not just means simply showing up and being with her during checkups and in labor. It is much more than that. To know what way a husband can help and support his wife during pregnancy and labor read below.
First, let’s start with pregnancy
First Trimester:
This is the time she will feel tired and exhausted due to nausea and vomiting, so you can help your partner with household tasks, moving things around, and cooking etc. She will resist certain foods since their smell or taste could trigger her nausea and vomiting. You can support your partner by helping to cook and encouraging her to have a healthy diet. Once you know that your partner is pregnant you can approach new dads (any one of your friends or any known person) to know their experience and in what way they have supported their pregnant partner.
You can start going with her to checkups with the doctor and be with her when they undergo a blood test or a scan. If you have the habit of smoking you need to stop it by this time since inhaling those could harm your partner and your baby too. Since she would experience vomiting throughout the day, at night she will feel dehydrated or have sudden hunger. In those times you can help by making some healthy snacks for her to eat. You can also encourage her to wake up early in the morning and do breathing exercises.
Second Trimester:
If she joins any childbirth classes, you can also participate with her to learn things about pregnancy and childbirth. You can also read books to learn about pregnancy and even breastfeeding. It is also the time you can accompany your partner for a walk every day in the park and start doing exercises along with your partner to motivate her. Since the second trimester is a high time where she will experience swelling of feet, pain in the back, tummy, or sometimes even the whole body, she might feel stressed out. You can sit and listen to your partner when they address these things to you. Instead of saying not to worry or telling them that it is normal and nothing to be concerned about, you can be supportive by giving her the help she needs. Eg: Giving her a massage when her back aches or bringing some warm water to soak her feet to reduce swelling etc. You can start helping your partner without being asked at this stage.
Third Trimester:
This will be the month where she wishes to do shopping for the baby, buy a crib and clothes, and make the room ready for the arrival of your baby. You can accompany your partner and help them with all these. You and your partner can go together to your doctor or midwife to get her a birth plan. You can also arrange the hospital bag for your partner to be prepared for any emergency. You should also know and be aware of the signs of labor, false contraction, and even learn about breastfeeding. You should also be prepared for any kind of emergency. You can also finish his office work before hand and plan his paternity leave accordingly.
Labor:
Finally, it’s the time your baby is ready to see the world. When her contractions have started or water broke or she experiences any bleeding you must immediately contact your doctor or midwife on what has to be done and when to bring her to the hospital. In the hospital, you can help your partner out by bringing in what she needs like water, hot bags, cushions, etc. You can help her in moving around or changing positions and also do coping techniques such as breathing exercises along with her. You can give her a good massage to cope with the pain. As the labor pain gets intense, few women need a supportive hug and care while few don’t even like to be touched. So do communicate with your partner about what she feel so that you could support her accordingly.
You can ask questions to the nurse or doctor about how much she has dilated or how far she has made. You should respect your partner's decision eg: if she planned for delayed cord clamping and skin to skin or any birth plans, you should be supportive of it. And not all things go according to the plan, sometimes it gets messy wherein an emergency she might be moved into the C section and at that time you need to communicate and take the advice of your healthcare provider and go with what they suggest rather than denying the changes with the plan. And once the baby comes out, you can take some nice pictures, bring flowers to your partner and also start taking care of the baby by wrapping the baby in a warm blanket etc. You can also support her by helping to walk. During breastfeeding you can help her by bringing in the things she needs like a cushion or a feeding pillow. And you could also help her with positioning and holding the baby for breastfeeding.
A good supportive partner is important right from the moment the woman conceives to the moment she gives birth as well as post-delivery since it plays a vital role in reducing the incidence of stress during pregnancy as well as postpartum depression. Finding a good antenatal class that involves educating both the mother as well as the father is also important. You shouldn’t just be the only one who supports and helps her out the whole time since you could also get exhausted at times. So it is important that other family members understand these and they could also help and care of her in whatever ways they can.
